Syra Van Jayx « Thread Started on Oct 21, 2006, 5:21pm »
((My character was abandoned at birth, and her parents may or may not be dead. However this has done nothing to her personality, so I hope you don't mind.))
The Roleplayer Name: Shana the awesomely pwnage Age: 16 Location: Mars Experience: I'm a newb by your terms, a measly 5 months.
The Character
Name: Syra Van Jayx, but she prefers Jayx or Sy.
Though in her illusion shows the crowd yells out to her as Illusion's girl; or the illusions brat.
Age: 16
Race: Elf, though what kind of elf is unknown by her.
Rank: Citizen
Origin: Shevraethe City
Magic: THE ULTIMATE POWER OF HAVING NO POWER!
Appearance: Sy is a youth of elven terms, and has short shoulder length hair. Not blond, but rather a strange hazel color. It is straight, and clashes oddly with her azure eyes. Her face is riddled with scars from tricks going wrong, though most of these are small; a long one adorns her left cheek. It goes near her ear, and she usually hangs her hair over this scar. Her skin is ivory and almost a perfect white. Where the scars on her face clash with the skin it goes red, which ruins her face. Her body is bony and thin, showing how underfed she is. She wears a Jade green cloak that has a tight wrap around her body, and under that she has a midnight blue tunic. Her feet are small, about a size two, though she rarely wears shoes, unless Karath requests them for the show.
Personality: She is not easily scared. Her past as an illusion-makers assistant has had many situations where swords get thrust through her, or almost do so. After doing this for ten years of her life her personality is quick-thinking, and is used to working with the illusion master and no-one else. Being able to manipulate others, but men in particular, has increased their tips, and in the end, their profits. This is probably the most important part of her personality, as she can manipulate well; usualy no-one notices she is doing so. She is sad most of the time, but not really an emo sad, just, pitifully so.
History: She was abandoned at birth, but when she was taken in by a petty peasant illusion master she has believed her was her father for fourteen years. When she found out at the age of fourteen because of a slip of this illusion masters tongue she cared little about it. The illusion master had taken care of her like a true father; and she cared little that he was not her true father.
Ever since she was taken in the illusion master. (Who went by that name at his shows, though was actually called Karath.) She had been taught the power of non-magical illusions. Not much of a life-skill really, but when she began to work at Karath's shows their profits doubled. They had enough food to feed them both. So, their proffession continued, and they made a living, but not an amazing one, as it is hard to earn much of a living in the arts when there are so many others in the city of arts. But, they managed it, and altough neither of them are the most well fed people in the city, they can live on what they earn.
But then, it began to change when she was ten. Rather than disappearing illusions it became more dangerous, swords that appear to go through her head, axes thrown at her when she was in a box. Great for Karath, not so good for the little girl of ten who almost got pulverized by every trick. That why her face is covered with scars. She spoke to Karath about this, and he began to lower the danger of the tricks, but they never went back to their original simpleistic matter.
So she kept getting cut, and began to respect the man less and less. By the time she was fourteen, she had become to the point where she almost hated him. But she could never stop, she knew little else, except being able to read and write very basically, which was taught to her for a few tricks that her that were quickly dropped from the show. This was her way of making a living, and she couldn't quit.
So, her hatred of him grew and grew, and eventually every show ended with a fist-fight between the two. You can imagine what that did to sales. They soared, doubled even, but the bruises they both suffered; in particular Syra's, began to slow down their shows. They were weaker as a result, and they decided this had to stop, one way or the other.
They reached a compromise, Karath promised to stop making the tricks so dangerous, and Syra promised to stop hating him. They continue their shows even now, but they are constantly wary of each other, of the other who might break the compromise, and their shows are suffering as a result. Syra dreams of bigger things, she dreams of having magic.
Strength: She has a kind heart, and the kind of personality that either makes you pity her, or offer her your hand. She can manipulate people well, even without magic.
Weakness: She is strong, for a female. However her attacks are unplanned, she does not 'fight' persay, but merely madly attack. She would easily get defeated in a fight by any who truly know how to fight, as she was never taught. She fears blood, it awakens the pains of the scars when they were born upon her face, and the sight of it makes her get dizzy and almost faint.
Other: Syra is naturally suspicious of near anyone she meets, probably because of her past experience with someone who seems trustworthy. Don't expect her to just roll over and let you rule over her, or roll all over her, she has more dignity than that and if you don't respect that, you will find her an enemy very quickly. Syra is still a youth even so, and doesn't understand the politics of the realm, she understands little apart from illusions; and rumours.
Who Invited You: Talon
Example
Trying to kill someone isn't the best way to say you're in love with someone, but when you are a creature of nightmares is that really relevant? Murder is his name, and he believes people should respect it. He growled carefully after the huge black nightmare stallion who had repelled his last attack. He knew he loved her, but without speech how much can he do? But to start, he thought, it would probably be best if he didn't try to sudduce her just yet. Hope, a stallion of pure blackness watched as the huge beast of writhing octopus-like tentacles lowered his head to her, a sign of respect. Hope knew what he meant by this, and begun to bow in reply. After their first meet of courting they decided to do something together, and what could possibly more enjoyable than killing mortals?
((I would like com and crit on my character if possible, and my example. I know it's not much good, because my best posts are my nightmare intros, so I'll post Hope's and Murder's intros for another example.))
They called her hope. Well that was her name from a nightmare of another. But hope she was not. Her pelt was black as an endless void. Her hooves were a shining black, appearing polished, but under the polished black was a hideous dark green colour, that could only be seen when you looked closer. What was hope you ask? Hope was a tall, horse-like creature except her back was riddled with long spines that were, like the rest of her, a haunting black colour. Under her jaw she had shorter spines; these ones were a midnight blue. It had seemed strange, awakening, and truly being for the first time. She shook her body, testing out her movement. Her fine pelt glistened under the full moon, shaking wearily as she sat. She yawned, revealing her huge teeth, glistening a fine silver colour. They were huge, the length of a human’s hand, it was amazing they could fit into her small, delicate mouth. Tipping each tooth was a tip of blood red. Finally she carefully opened her slit-like eyelids to reveal blood red eyes, and she stared upon the streets of London. Around her, other nightmare beasts sat, testing their body movements. Mortals could be seen fleeing from the monsters, and Hope stared carefully at each of them, and began to rise, and decided what her purpose would truly be. She would silence these mortals, for how they had ‘contained’ her, and the other nightmare beasts that surronded her.
That's hope, now Murder is the one people say is better, as it has a lot of scope for your imagination on what Murder looks like.
Murder opened his crimson eyes. To him, this day had changed his life. He was no longer trapped in the mind of a nun, he was free, and he would live up to his name. What was he? A strange creature, a beast worthy of satan's eyes. It started with a long whip like tail, though thick at the tails beginning thinned out. The tail was the length of a horse, and was covered in short midnight blue spines. Where his tail ended his torso began. It was made of long bonelike implements that went down his two flanks. There were small gaps, no more than half a centimeter wide, between each of these bones on his flanks. When the flanks rose into Murders back it came as wavy fur, which was a jade green, and some was pitch black. His legs, they were strange little things. For they only went down to the knee joints, before splitting into long tentacles which Murder used to travel with. It was an inconvenient way of walking, but made it outstandingly easy to jump into the air. Those jumps usually ended with him swooping into the air with his huge feathered wings. Each of the feathers was a different colour, but they were all incredibly dark shades of blue, green or solid black. But it was his head that gave people true fear. It began at the neck, which was skinless, made of solid bone. Then it thickened, into his true head. His lower jaw was longer than his upper jaw, and had large teeth, about a fingers length for every tooth. His upper jaw had teeth much the same, but you wouldn’t know that unless you were inside. For on his upper jaw tentacles sprouted; long and octopus-like. They were shades of dark purple. And finally his eyes. Crimson in colour, and you could see his lack of soul through them. Not just the soullessness, the heartlessness. Finally horns sprouted from above his eye sockets , huge ghastly horns, of a black colour, streaked with jade green. This monstrosity, which was murder, had awoken, in the streets of London, and he didn’t intend of returning to where he had come from. Not without living up to his name.
((Well, I think that's everything, now to wait and see if I'm accepted. And, I hope you find this ok, I'll be doubling a bit with Karath when one of his illusion shows is on, so I hope you don't mind. He won't really be a character.))
« Last Edit: Oct 24, 2006, 3:15am by nomoredeath »
Joined: Sept 2006 Gender: Male Posts: 34 Location: Canada
Re: Syra Van Jayx « Reply #1 on Oct 23, 2006, 6:14pm »
Pretty good. Couple of things.
1. Because she's sixteen, your character will not be allowed to take part in anything 'mature'. 2. Please type the number when writing rather than the numbers itself {example: thirteen instead of 13} 3. If she's not much of a fighter, she wouldn't have given him bruises. 4. Instead of having her be cliche and abandoned, how about her family sold her into the slavery of the Illusion Master. 5. You say she has "the kind of personality that either makes you pity her, or offer her your hand", but that's not the impression I get from her personality that you typed.
Re: Syra Van Jayx « Reply #2 on Oct 24, 2006, 3:09am »
((You're right about the personality thing, and I kept in mind the fact she was only sixteen. But... She definately was abandoned, and it is unlikely I'll change that, as it's an important part of her history. People don't get 'sold' at birth, as others would not likely buy them, as they don't know their personality, strengths or weaknesses.
"Though she seems to occasionally awaken some strength within herself when she is very angry."
But, perhaps I had better make it a bit clearer.))
![[Home]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/menu/home.gif)
![[Help]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/menu/help.gif)
![[Search]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/menu/search.gif)
![[Login]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/menu/login.gif)
![[Register]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/menu/register.gif)
![[Search This Thread]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/search2.gif)
![[Send Topic To Friend]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/buttons/sendtopic.gif)
![[Print]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/buttons/print.gif)
Author
Logged![[aim]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/aim.gif)
![[homepage]](http://s4.images.proboards.com/buttons/www_sm.gif)
